This post is a follow-up to my last post “Content to covet“
One thing the God has been teaching me with the birth of my daughter is to be content with what I do have instead of what I don’t. Or to be excited for what is right instead of what is wrong. I had been learning that in ministry over the last couple of years, but it has been reaching other areas of my life. The point was really crystal clear to me with my daughter a few days ago.
Annalise has generally been a happy baby. With all the stories we’ve heard, we consider ourselves pretty lucky. At the same time, she has her moments where she’s not the easiest to handle. This usually happens in combination with a lack of sleep on her parent’s part. Sleep deprivation will change a person faster than most anything I’ve experienced.
One night last week, she was not staying asleep more than maybe 45-60 minutes at a time without waking up in tears. After my wife had gotten up with her more than a few times, at 2:45 AM I got up to see if I could help and give my wife a break. I tried all 3 of the tricks I knew and nothing was really working. She would go from a few minutes of silence to many minutes of crying and maybe even some inconsolable full-on crying.
As I sat in her pitch black room, with the sound of white noise playing at a pretty high volume, I felt a little helpless. Well, I felt a lot helpless. I was getting frustrated that I couldn’t help. At that point, though, I was reminded of a time more than a year ago.
3 days after our first ultrasound, my wife was having some signs that a nurse over the phone said might point to a miscarriage. I had to work that day and throughout the day my wife had texted me off and on of the emotional roller-coaster she was enduring. That evening we talked and Dawn had dealt with the perceived reality that the baby in it’s early stages had been lost. I remember sitting with my wife and singing the only part of the Bob Marley song, 3 little birds, that I knew; “Don’t worry about a thing; Cause every little thing, is gonna be alright.” (I have no clue why since I’ve never listened to Bob.) That night we cried, we laughed, and we thanked God for drawing us closer together.
We went to the appointment and the OB said even she had to check the second ultrasound more than once, because she too thought we didn’t have a “viable pregnancy”. She called our now ultrasound-visible baby a “miracle baby”. My wife cried for joy and she threw away the list of questions she had written for the doctor, including “How soon can we try to get pregnant again?” What an amazing day for us to thank God even more!
Fast forward to where I was now, holding my 6 month-old daughter who was a little fussy. I was flooded with the joy of having a daughter to even be fussy. I was so thankful to have the privilege to stay up 2 hours with my daughter. I didn’t care at that point what the perfect situation would look like on the surface because my bit of perfection was sleepily, wonderfully, and beautifully crying in my arms. Oh what a joy to have been blessed with a reason to be up at 3 AM.
So I was reminded about what I did have instead of what didn’t. I was taught and touched at my core. It’s easy for me to focus on other things at times, but I’m thankful that God draws me to the things I do have and the realization that circumstances don’t dictate my identity in Christ nor my blessedness in that reality.
In what ways does God demonstrate that to you?